Is God Angry if You Miss Church? Bible Testing Applications of Hebrews 10:25

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I vividly remember sitting in the hospital room feeling tremendous guilty after the birth of one of my children. Our beautiful child had bee born after many hours of labor and, though we were both exited and exhausted, my wife understandably much more so, I was also a bit panicked. It was a Friday and since we were still at hospital, we might miss church on Sunday. It seems silly now, but the idea of doing so caused me to be assaulted with shame, fear, and guilt. I would prove that I was a weak Christian or uncommitted to the church if we did not show up on Sunday. I scolded myself, am I really grateful to Jesus if I can’t deal with a little fatigue and inconvenience to be obedient to God’s command? 

Thankfully, the Lord showed me unreasonable and unloving my thoughts were to my wife, my new baby, my older kids, and to God. Despite this clarity, it took a few more years for the Lord to show me the root cause that tempted me to place an outward acts of piety above caring for those who are my responsibility. Lack of sleep played a part , but so did the many teachings I had heard since I became a Christian subtly and not so subtly misapplying Hebrews 10:25. The consistent message was God is disappointed or angry with me if I did not come to church for every service and happy with me when I made more services. My real desire to be faithful and express my love of God was hijacked by my flesh with the aid and support of bad teaching on what is a great verse of Scripture, Hebrews 10:25:

not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.      

I love going to church each Sunday. I enjoy the experience and have grown immeasurably as a result of my time with God’s people in service. This is not an anti-church post as a result. I love the church in all of its complexity and imperfections and love inviting people to church. What I don’t love is messages that fundamentally alter the meaning of God’s encouragement in Hebrews 10:25 and misrepresent His intent for church in order to turn church attendance into a loveless crushing burden for Christians.

These sort of misapplications earn the misuse of Hebrews 10:25 the spot of # 3 on my list of Commonly Misapplied and Misused Bible verses, Hebrews 10:25:

#3

not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.

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What does the misuse of Hebrews 10:25, look like?

The severe and legalistic version often mixes together an unhealthy view of one particular church or denomination with fear and shame to create a false bright line test for salvation. It links your work in coming to church with your membership in God’s family. It is summed up in the often asked rhetorical question:

If you don’t go to (this particularly or church at a set schedule) church, can you really call yourself a Christian? 

It also looks like these real examples:

The Word of God teaches that not belonging to a congregation is an unforgivable sin and one will go to hell for not belonging to a congregation. God commands you not to forsake this fellowship. You can’t disobey God and not expect consequences.

Only we here at (Church or denomination name) preach the true Word of God. All those other churches are compromising and trying to get you to as well because they don’t really have the Holy Spirit. They are leading you away from obedience to Hebrews 10:25. 

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The attitude accompanying this appeal ranges from angry and superior to tearful and lamenting, but the core of the cultish argument is the same:

You are not a real Christian if you don’t go to THIS church or denomination. You are not real Christian if you don’t meet my standard for how much you go to THIS church.  It is come to church or perish.

The subtler version of this misapplication is all too common as well. It is not as harsh, but the burdens it places on Christians are just as real and crushing. Your view of yourself as a “good” or “bad” Christian is detached from Jesus and transferred to some standard about your level of church involvement. It is not that you are alleged to be not Christian if you don’t go to every service held at the particular building, it is you are not a faithful Christian.

I saw way too many of these sort of arguments during the height of the Pandemic. I was greatly saddened by some turning their preferences into God directed judgments on the maturity and faithfulness of the church.

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Here are more real examples:

In this age of laxity, many have lost sight of the fact that it is a mortal sin to skip church on Sunday or a holy day of obligation when one is able to attend.  

Christians have been taking the Lords’ command in Hebrews 10:25 to meet on Sundays so seriously throughout history that they were willing to die rather than disobey the Lord. What is your reason for not being at church?

Hebrews 10:25 tells us to gather even more as we see the Day approaching. Do you see that…you should gather so much more as you see the Day approaching. God tells you that you need to be here as much as possible, even more than before, if you see that things are out of control and see the Lord coming.

In each of the above examples, though it may not seem obvious at first reading, the actual message conveyed significantly adds to, misconstrues, or misstates the meaning of Hebrews 10:25. In doing so, the speakers create rules that are claimed to be mandatory and biblical, but that God Himself never actually set forth. Hebrews simply does not say what they claim it means.

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The wisdom of Charles Spurgeon is particularly appropriate regarding this challenging question:

Discernment is not knowing the difference between right and wrong. It is knowing the difference between right and almost right. Charles Spurgeon

This includes the situation when you hear or read a teaching that seems accurate and biblical, initially, but you have a lingering feeling that there is something wrong. It often involves ideas and concepts that are close to being accurate and that fit within your expectations for life, your normal patterns, and your history that it is hard to accept they are not actually true. They are almost right and Bible verses were quoted, so you can be tempted to just go along with them. Yet, what does the Lord tell you to do?

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15

The Bible is regularly misused and manipulated to try to make it fit the agendas of people. You are charged with correctly handling the word of truth – not merely take any man’s claims as truth. Why? The answer is clear:

Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God; because many false prophets have gone out into the world. 1 John 4:1

You are warned about outright false teachers many times in the Bible and told to be on your guard. You are called as a Christian to reject all such teachings and doctrines – totally wrong or almost right – as they are contrary to Christ and listen to the Lord. 

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What does the Bible actually say in Hebrews 10:25?

Not what someone else says about Hebrews 10:25 that is almost right – but what does it say?

²⁴ And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, ²⁵ not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.

Hebrews 10

Let’s take the sting out of the bad application of these verses at the outset. There is nothing in here about God being angry, disappointed, or displeased with you if you don’t make it to church on Sunday…nothing.

Hebrews 10:25 is there to encourage believers suffering under intense pressure. It comes within a passage of Scripture focused on how Jesus is so much better than what they were used to under the Mosaic Law. The many mandatory requirements of the Law and the constant work required are weighed against the abundant rest and perfect peace available through the great High Priest, Jesus and found totally wanting. The Lord offered one sacrifice for all sufficient for eternity which is a stark contrast with the priests who were required to work day and night. Given the clear theme of the passage, it makes no logical or contextual sense for Hebrews to then make church attendance a mandatory requirement.  You cannot applaud the freedom to rest in Jesus’ completed work while also creating a necessary work to complete His work. Freedom is freedom, rest is rest, grace is grace.

For the law, having a shadow of the good things to come, and not the very image of the things, can never with these same sacrifices, which they offer continually year by year, make those who approach perfect. ² For then would they not have ceased to be offered? For the worshipers, once purified, would have had no more consciousness of sins. ³ But in those sacrifices there is a reminder of sins every year. ⁴ For it is not possible that the blood of bulls and goats could take away sins.

Hebrews 10:1-4

You may wonder whether this applies even to good things like going to church. After all, it is beneficial to go to church and Christians are always pictured in community in the Bible. Why would making something good mandatory be wrong? There are two main reasons: 

First –

Turning church into a work upon which to base your view of God’s heart toward you misses the entire point of Christian community and the Gospel. Church is not a duty to endure. It is not something you are required to slog through to show you care about God or prove your discipline. It is meant to be a place for you to be blessed, loved, and discipled while you learn about God’s unwavering love for you. The difference in attitude involved is like the contrast between going to see the dentist and going to see someone you deeply love. You should show up for both and there are bad results when you choose not to, but the dentist is a reluctant necessity while seeing your beloved is your soul’s desire. God is not interested in your grudging attendance at church or else. He wants your joyful heart wanting to be part of a group you love. Jesus targeted a similar misunderstanding of His ways when addressing the Pharisees and their view of the Sabbath under the Law:

 But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy and not sacrifice.’ For I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners, to repentance.”

Matthew 9:13

God’s people were not made for use, convenience, and population of the Church. The Church is part of God’s beautiful plan for you.

Second –

Upon first glance, it may appear that you run into problems with my argument when you look at Hebrews 10:25. It commands you that you must go to church, right?

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Well, put aside what you have been told the verse means and what you are used to think of as church, and look again:  

And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day

Please remember, I am pro-church attendance, but I expect people who claim “God specifically says so” to show me where He does. Looking closely at Hebrews 10:25, you see that God says:

1 – Assemble

2 – With other Christians (ourselves).

3 – Don’t Forsake Gathering

What does God not say?:

1 – Assemble with a specific local church or body

2 – Assemble at a specific interval

3 – The Nature or Date of Your Assembly

4 – That He will be angry if you don’t Assemble

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I know I am simplifying with these lists, but this issue can be so overcomplicated you can miss God’ s point. He says it is good to gather together as believers and you can spend many hours discussing the good that comes from church. Yet, He does not create a command to do so in one fashion on one day or say He will be angry if you don’t. You can look back to the people to whom Hebrews was written to see clear proof of this claim.

The early church did not meet in cathedrals and had no denominations. ”Attending church” looked very different for the first disciples than it does for you today. The churches most often met at the home of one of the people involved or wherever available. The church of the Apostles in Jerusalem started off meeting at the Temple and that in Ephesus at the School of Tyranus. They also appear to meet at many different times during the week. The school at Ephesus met every day of the week in the middle of the day, for example, and who can forget Eutychus, the young man who fell asleep as the church service went past midnight. The church did traditionally meet on Sunday to honor the day of the Resurrection, but they also gathered in many other ways on many other days. The churches of the saints in the Bible, therefore, often looked nothing like your expectations for modern church and they are never spoken of negatively in the Bible on these issues. As a result, if God did not take these churches to task for their variety expressed in real worship and fellowship, it is inconsistent and unbiblical for any man to do so in His place. Put simply, since you are not God, you can’t make rules only He has the authority to set out.

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Does this Mean I Don’t Have to Go to Church to be a Christian?

Though this is a much larger issue, there is not necessarily a connection between church attendance and being a Christian. Salvation is based on Jesus alone and there may be a many reasons why you cannot attend a specific church – some bad and others good. I know Christians who love Jesus and who have been hurt greatly by bad actors hiding in the church for whom the idea of stepping into a “church building” causes great pain. My heart breaks over both their hurt their alienation from church. Other Christians embrace different forms of “assembling ourselves” like those present in the early church. They gather for regular Bible study and fellowship with other Christians in home based gatherings, for example. They may rent out schools like the one in Ephesus for a more informal gathering or meet in coffee shops. They come in as many forms, but share the goals of worshipping Jesus, fellowshipping, and learning more about the Lord. Their involvement in something culturally unorthodox does not mean they are “forsaking the assembling ourselves together” according to the Lord.

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A Christian should want to gather in some form with other Christians to worship Jesus and be part of the Body of Christ. Not having any interest in church may be part of the evidence that a person is a cultural Christian only. Yet, salvation is based on faith in Jesus alone – not works of any kind, including attending church, so that no man can boast.

Encouragement to Attend Church

I love going to the church. Being part of a specific church with good leadership is a great thing and will help you grow in Christ. On the flip side, not going to any church or participating regularly in meaningful discipleship, community, or fellowship will have a negative impact on your walk with Jesus. There is so much to be gained from being around God’s people that you just don’t get by yourself. Dealing with others is not easy, but that is part of the benefit as true love and growth don’t often come when things are easy. I would strongly encourage you, therefore to go to a church or a fellowship of some kind where you are led, known, valued, and challenged. It was God who made us part of a flock and sheep benefits from being physically with the flock. BUT…

God’s encouragement is for your blessing and for the good of the church. It is a gift, not a millstone to crush you with. If you are struggling with guilt, shame, pride, or box checking about your church attendance or service, you are free to let it go. Jesus checked all of the boxes you need for admission into heaven and to be beloved of Him.

Reclaim God’s intentions behind Hebrews 10:25 and participate in the assembly of the church as it was meant to be experience – as a blessing, a joy, and a freely chosen gathering of the redeemed in Christ.